Small post..
I realised today.. That people-pleasers have the worst life. You time and time again try to swallow your own happiness with the belief that it will make others happy.. You always try to look at the other persons face and try to understand what he/she actually wants.. And you make sure you mirror the same emotion.. Or thoughts... So that your need of wanting to be on the same page as the other person is satisfied..
I'm one of these people.. I try hard to always not be an inconvenience to others.
But I've come to realise that.. This is the worst way to live.. Because.. In ignoring your emotions and wants.. You're abusing yourself...you're creating unnecessary negative energy.. You're angry.. For not getting your way and for having to bow down to the other person's way.. It's all a frustrating circle..
So.. I want us (people pleasers) to say NO more.. Say it right to their faces.. Because that other person did the same to you.. By not understanding YOUR thoughts.. So u have every right to say NO... repeat after me.. NO NO NO..
I want to say no more... I have realised that we try so hard to please others because we somehow want something out of them.. Maybe they are our parents.. Our caretakers or our partners ... Basically our need to please everybody comes from wanting them to look at us in a pleasing light..
But there's a solution to this.. That solution is.. To be independent... Start caring for yourself.. If your mind is screaming no.. Then listen to it..be bold.. Make others uncomfortable.. Make them angry.. It's ok.. Say this to yourself.. IT'S OK TO MAKE OTHERS UNCOMFORTABLE OR ANGRY.. Because on the other side of that.. Lies YOUR happiness. I don't know when I will be completely independent.. But that's my goal for sure.. This is also my resolution for 2017...
Whats yours?.. :-)
Xoxo
Anu
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